Monday, April 14th, 2003
      Something bit me last night hard enough to wake me up out of a dead sleep. It was the size of a large ant and may have been just that. I was too tired to play entymologist. There was some kind of urgent situation this morning, like the kids woke up late for school or something. I heard hurried footsteps and doors whisking open. The excitement got the dogs barking. Obviously, it was a little much to sleep through. Julio has been trying to persuade me to return to his house to live permanently when I return to El Tambo in a month. It’s a good house, the kids are cool, everyone is extraordinarily funny, I’m highly esteemed and there are always people here ready and willing to do or go wherever I want…. but I’m going to need a place to get away from people and Julio’s house is a little too small for the amount of traffic it receives.

      Julio and I went to Ancon, a town located about 5 km south of el Tambo. Ancon has a coastline like parts of Southern California. Julio and everyone else insists it is too dangerous to swim in and thus is completely unused by anyone. There were OK waves, but nothing special. When the English owned the oil companies in Ecuador, Ancon was full of Englishmen. But now, 30 years after Ecuador took over its own oil reserves, Ancon is half-abandoned.

      We headed back to El Tambo early because Julio said there was some kind of gathering to remember the one year anniversary of his brother’s death. However, when we got back, Julio and I didn’t even attend the gathering. We walked right past it in fact- not at all dressed for the occasion- because Julio wanted me to see a guy that uses a bus engine to power a circular saw to cut large logs into planks of wood. Back at the house, Julio and his wife broke out a bag of family photographs. Julio’s wife repeatedly smacked him in the head when I could effortlessly name the people in the older photographs but he hesitated. Julio broke out pictures of his service in the Ecuadorian military in 1981. I had earlier told Julio that I had heard the Ecuadorian militaries armouries keep blowing up (at least 2 in the last year alone) because someone is covering up the missing arms they’ve been selling to the FARC. He concurred and then told me that when the military had stationed him in the eastern jungles near the Columbian border, a carload of his friends went up the road to a store and were blasted apart by Colombian guerrillas. I had no idea how that was supposed to pertain to my statement, so I asked him why the Colombians had opened fire on the Ecuadorian soldiers. His answer was, “Because the Colombians are guerrillas.” OK, fair enough. But disco still sucks.

     I declined Julio’s offer to take me up the road to check out his son’s boss’ Landrace hogs, but he insisted and I really didn’t have anything better to do. On the way back from the hogs, Julio asked me to critique set up of his son’s boss’ farm. I told him the pigs were a little sunburned because they weren’t getting enough shade, but they didn’t seem too stressed about it so it probably wasn’t impacting their health. Then I realized I was on another continent having a discussion about hog farming in a language I wasn’t born speaking. Julio looked at me because I had stopped talking. I looked back at him and wondered if my companionship wasn’t filling the void left by his brother a little too conveniently. Then I wondered what time my watch would read if it were on my wrist. I blinked. Somewhere in the cosmos, a record scratched at length.

      At night, I was hanging out in my room taking notes from a book on pig farming and falling asleep sitting upright. Somewhere in the house I could here kids going bananas. Julio and his son came to hang out in my room, followed soon thereafter by Guido. They camped out in there having the time of their lives and would not leave. I don’t think I’m going to return to this house when I come back to stay for good or I’m never going to get enough rest.

  Tuesday, April 15th, 2003
      I had packed up all my things last night so I woke up this morning ready to roll. San Miguel, here I come. People kept showing up at the house all morning to bid me their individual farewells, including a small crowd of uniformed school children. Then Julio and I grabbed a bus to Guayaquil. At the bus station in Guayaquil, 2 policemen busted up to me and Julio as we were reading bus schedules and demanded identification. For a second I thought they were joking. Nope. They seemed ready to knock some heads together. “This is a copy of a passport!” one policeman growled, “where’s the real one?” Maybe this sort of thing accounts for Guayaquil’s out of control crime problem: the police are looking for trouble in all the wrong places. Or maybe Ecuador has been having problems with rich gringos beating down the doors in hopes of residing illegally in the country and mooching off Ecuador’s stellar economy. Nah, they were hoping to find something wrong with my passport so they could play hardball and get me to bribe my way out of trouble. Julio wanted to wait on the bus with me until it was ready to leave to make sure no one lured me away with candy. I bought a watch for 6 bucks from a guy hawking them bus to bus. Then Julio left and I embarked upon 5 hours worth of highway and animal crackers up to Santo Domingo.

     My reception at my house I San Miguel was weird, as it seemed no one was sure of the appropriate response to a gringo you kind of used to know showing back up at your house after 8 days from a place you vaguely feel you’re competing with. After a self-haircut and the mother of all showers, I emerged from my room and had a 100% flawless conversation with EcuaMom, meaning my week of submersion in a Spanish less intelligible than hers had actually improved my all around comprehension.

  Wednesday, April 16th, 2003
      Calazacon. Everyone had to give a presentation in Spanish about their site visit. Later, Animal Production did some beekeeping. It was definitely interesting. They use bees that have been crossed to varying degrees with the perennially insane African (killer) Bees because it makes them hardier in the tropical climate. We poked around in several progressively more Africanized hives until the last one when we got to reap the benefit of Roberto’s (head trainer of Animal Production’s) talent for miscalculation. Roberto reminds me a little of Christopher Lloyd’s character in Back to the Future. For all of Roberto’s extensive knowledge and experience, he sure makes a lot of stupid mistakes. When we approached the most Africanized hive, Roberto ordered everyone not wearing veils to leave, saying, “These bees WILL attack your eyes and mouth.” I was actually wearing a veil but decided I didn’t need to see the inside of yet another hive under such conditions. I backed way up. In the distance I heard Roberto saying, in a voice rather consistent with oblivion, “Hear the way their wings are buzzing? That means their reeeeally angry. Ok, see the way they’re coming at me? These bees are very bravo.” The circle of gringos near the hive vacillated and then expanded a bit. A guy named Adam emerged from one side of the circle holding his elbow. He had been stung and had then smashed the offending bee. This, in the world of swarming instincts and compound eyeballs, made Adam a marked man. The bees chased Adam all the way down the hill, stinging him a total of 4 times as he and a varied assortment of alarmed gringos fled down the path to safety. The hive lid was replaced and the exhibition ended abruptly with 3 more stingings befalling the hive’s owner. That night, Jason (of San Miguel) returned from the Galapagos islands. I stopped by his house to see how his trip had been and to buy 12 pounds of chicken feed from his EcuaDad.

  Thursday, April 17th, 2003
      In Spanish class, Talwaza Jason and his Spanish teacher showed up to use the telephone, as there are no phones in Talwaza. It appears that Jason is showing signs of having Malaria. He called the Peace Corps medical people and they sent him to Santo Domingo to have tests done. Grace and I went into Santo Domingo so she could conduct interviews with market vendors as part of some complete horse waste the peace Corps was having her program do. Then we stuffed our faces at a restaurant called blue dreams. Then all the usual things we always do in town happened.

     At night, back in San Miguel, Jaime tried to pass a counterfeit Sacagewea off on me. Back when Ecuador had first become dolarized and the average person wasn’t all that familiar with American currency, there were a lot of these counterfeits entering the country from Columbia- but now they have mostly all been removed from circulation. This was an especially good counterfeit. We broke out a real Sacagewea for comparison. The counterfeit lacked the 2 different tones of metal when you peered at its edge and was a tad thinner than the real coin. Bouncing the 2 off the ground, the counterfeit sounds tinnier.

  Friday, April 18th, 2003
      Because I am behind on some of my writing, I borrowed San Miguel Jason’s laptop and typed from 9:30am till 8.45 pm, when he came back to pry the computer out of my hands. That was the whole day.

  Saturday, April 19th, 2003
      Micah stopped by early today while I was working on some stuff I am behind on. He was headed to the river to wash clothes. After he left, I decided I was tired of working on stuff so I went to the river to join him. Washing clothes at the river is a sort of social event for women here. With the exception of Micah, men don’t wash clothes. Much later, around 5 pm, San Miguel Jason and I headed into Santo Domingo. There was a gringo Peace Corps party taking place at 8pm near Calazacon in a district called Nueva Aurora. Jason and I were leaving 3 hours early because the busses stop running past San Miguel at 7pm, but run until at least 10 or 11 in and around the Santo Domingo area. If we left now and killed time in Santo Domingo, which is easy enough to do, we could show up at the party at our leisure, rather than an hour early from the San Miguel bus line. The gringo fiesta was well attended and quite lively. I took it that these gringos had done this fiesta business before. They didn’t even seem to need the Peace Corps brass to intervene and do a day long presentation on “how to party”, complete with exasperating group activities and competency examinations. I had intended to stay the night in Nueva Aurora, as there was no way to get back to San Miguel, but instead left with the people who live in a place called Santa Lucia, as doing so would shave more than an hour off my morning commute to a beach town of Pedernales

  Sunday, April 20th, 2003
      Were it not for the willpower of the other gringos in Santa Lucia, I would never have caught the 6am bus to Pedernales. I might not have caught any busses to anywhere, save for the sleepy bus to dreamland. I slept on the bus and arrived reasonably rested in Pedernales at about 8:30am. We found other Peace Corps gringos already there. We deposited our bags in their hotel room and changed into our swim wear. After a modest breakfast, we hit the beach. I and gringo extraordinaire Matt Trout rented boogie boards and went fisticuffs with the first waves that looked cross at us. An hour later, Matt graciously passed off his board to another gringo who then spent the next 2 hours helping me mow down breakers and show the ocean who was running what. Around 12:30pm, the gringos of Santa Lucia and I washed off the ocean salts and donned our street wear again back at our compañeros hotel room. None of us had brought much money to the beach and now, we discovered, some of us had also lost a few bills splashing in the waves. We pooled our money and found we had exactly enough to get all of us home. That much was fine, but we were all starving and so we set out on an exhaustive search for other Peace Corps gringos to borrow money from. Having succeeded in this endeavour, we headed back to the beach to eat and do more beach stuff, but, having filled our stomachs, found ourselves falling asleep sitting upright in our seats. We placed ourselves on the next bus home. Our bus was having some kind of air flow obstruction in its engine or something. About a ½ into our ride, every time our bus tried to slow down into the lower RPMs of first gear, the engine would stall out. After 5 or 10 minutes of tinkering beneath the hood, the driver sputtered the engine to live again and then popped the clutch so hardcore our spines misaligned and sent the thoughts from our heads rolling around on the floor beneath the multitude of ill-maintained seats. After several more stall outs, the driver abandoned slowing down altogether and took the speed bumps and potholes alike at a velocity that made for brain swelling and loose teeth. When at last we made it to a big city along the way (el Carmen), the bus allowed itself a final puking so all aboard could switch to another bus waiting nearby. By the time we arrived in Santa Lucia, I realized it would be nothing but a crapshoot if I were to attempt a mad scramble for the final bus heading up via Puerto Limon. Chances were good (and as I later found out, very, very good) that I would wind up stranded in the rain at the mouth of my highway, 6km from home. So, I took the safe bet and stayed again in Santa Lucia.

WEEK 8       WEEK 10

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